How can my husband and I entice our teenage children—a son nearly 15 and a 12-year-old daughter— to hike and camp with us? We've always enjoyed such activities together, but now that they're getting older, they're not as enthused.

Amy Peregoy
Waldorf, Maryland

Alice's Answer:

Since most teens don't want to be anywhere near their folks, it's no wonder they're not excited about sleeping nose to nose in a tent or spending the day walking and chatting with you. But don't give up.

Give your teenagers as much input as possible into any outings. Let them pick the day, trail, camping spot, or activity, for example. Sometimes just letting them be in charge helps break down the resistance. (This can work with kids of all ages, not just teenagers.)

Let your kids separate themselves from you as much as they need to. They would probably enjoy having their own tent on your trips, for example, or bringing a friend or group of friends along. However, don't let them get carried away with the separation idea. They may want to walk ahead or behind on a hike, for example, but you shouldn't be too far apart, and you need to have a strictly enforced system of staying in touch and waiting for each other at trail junctures. You may often feel like telling your teenager to get lost, but you probably don't mean it, at least not permanently.

Look for activities with plenty of excitement. Would your kids like to go to Great Falls of the Potomac and watch the kayakers practice in the rapids? If you were coming to New England, I'd suggest a backpacking trip to Mahoosuc Notch, billed as the toughest mile on the Appalachian Trail-a surreal area filled with giant boulders that offer caverns, tight squeezes (you'll have to take off your backpack to get through) and plenty of scrambling.

Perhaps your son and daughter would like to try something completely different, like mountain biking, rock climbing, or orienteering. Offer them a chance for some outdoor thrills.

Last but not least, bribe your kids creatively. One clever mom I spoke with got her daughters camping by throwing a Mary Kay cosmetic party during the trip. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

Good luck!